Dating with pets (like, lots of them)

[ZooKeeper83]

This is going to sound bad, but since college I've had my best luck with Myspace.  Though, I've also found the biggest creeps there, but you just have to ignore and block those.    The good part about Myspace is if anyone bothers to read one word about me, they'll have to notice how big of an animal person I am.  I also have listed ALL of my little ones.  If someone has a problem with that, they don't have to message me.  Just be very picky about who you actually talk to or maybe meet.  Out of every person I talked with on there, I only met two in person - one of which is still a good friend that moved to Cali and the other of which is my current other half that I just bought a house with.  There are tons of others that I messaged back and forth for months, but never quite felt comfortable meeting them.  Trust your gut.

But like others have said, just put it out there about your interests and love of animals.  Eventually, another crazy person just like yourself will find you.   

And NEVER let anyone think you're weird or odd (in a bad way) for having the animals you have!  I have best friends that still tell me I should just 'calm down a little' about the animal stuff.  I've been told that normal people just have an animal or two and don't have to go all out like I do for them.  I just tell them I know a few people that are just like me.  Maybe not in person, but they're out there on this little message board I visit occasionally.   

Oh!  And a quick little math equation that deals with two of my old coworkers - 1 bird rescuer/zookeeper + 1 reptile rescuer/zookeeper + engagement + new house = somewhere btw 50 and 75(+?) animals (from airdales to blue and gold macaws to full grown rainbow boas and on and on and on) somehow fitting in their house because neither can say no to an animal in need

That's why you need at least one that can keep the other one from adding 'just one more' when you really don't have the means for it.  I honestly don't know how they are still able to afford them all.  Especially after the one dropped down to only working a few hours a week and taking care of the animals the rest.  Zookeeper salary is definitely lacking.   

Good luck!!

[MsMagpie]

Go to all the adoption events in your area and start scoping out the male fosters! 

[PirateCaptainLoo]

I suggest not looking. Hubby and I met online five years ago and started totally as friends, and now he's the best friend I could have ever asked for. Personally, I think it's better to start as friends then progress into a romantic relationship because that's really all any relationship is based on; friendship. He gets a little irritated when I mention more animals right now because of the financial situation, but he loves all the kids just as much, if not more, than I do. We currently have 8 rats, 2 cats, a puppy, and a snake. Such a jungle.

[courtneybee]

Well, I have 2 dogs (I had 3, my boy Dykstra passed in February.. he was 14. The worst loss I've had. He was my heart.), a cat, & 2 rats. I'm getting 3 new little boy ratties Thursday! At the time I met my boyfriend, I also had 3 ducks. These newest rats will be my self-imposed limit. For now.

We met in high school, but started "talking" through myspace. A wonderful invention, that! I've sort of noticed that lots of people who love animals also seem to be on the shy side when it come to the dating world. I'm no exception.. well, I'm shy when it comes to anything. But long story short.. I've made it VERY VERY clear that animals are going to be a part of my life FOREVER. And he's OK with that. He likes animals, but he isn't passionate about them the way that I am. However, he has supported me whenever I've needed something, driven me to the vet, come with me to adopt, things like that. That's the most important thing. You can't expect people to feel the way you do about everything, but as long as they respect you enough to support you in your passions, that's all you need.

[Destiny]

I totally agree with you.  My boyfriend isn't as passionate as I, but he supports me and loves my babies as much as I do... I hope lol

[Han]

My fiance has never had pets. He doesn't really get the idea of pets at all and the whole idea rather freaks him out [1]. The first time he came round to my house we had a snooze on the sofa... me on the cushion, him on me, Oberon on him. I think he actually quite liked it  If he hadn't, or if he'd been squeamish or disgusted, he'd have been out on his ear.

Now I have the option of getting these four boys, and he knows how much it means to me. I think he likes the idea that I'll have something to care for and coo over that won't be him (I think he gets secretly a bit fed up when I cluck over him! ) and something that will give me company when he's not around.

I dunno. There's lots of things that people find controversial about me. Nowadays I tend to smile disarmingly and say, "well, people always like to comment silly things like there's the pet rats and people are always like eww and sewers and stuff like wild rats are anything to do with pet ones, or there's the motorbikes and people are always like oh you know doctors call bikers 'donors' and yawn or that they're really dangerous and blah, or there's the London Underground which people are like you're nuts and you're a trainspotter and you're geeky and weird, so, hey, you know I just don't talk so much about myself nowadays. So what are *you* into?" [2] And if you laugh and smile open-heartedly while you do it, people can't help but be caught short with their prejudices and laugh with you and approach you with an open mind! Try it, it really works!

As for online dating? My current squeeze is from the net. My previous three (and we're going back to 1994 here) were from the older pre-net version: magazines.

As for the $*%& that give you nonsense - honey, there's 6 billion people world-wide, 300 million of which live in the States. You can't possibly get on with every single one, so don't beat yourself up if you don't fit in with someone right away. OTOH you're bound to find one out of those 300 mill that feels the same way as you... stick with it!

HAN

[1] probably as a result of the physical and mental abuse he suffered when he was a child. Maybe - you never know - these 'useless' blokes praps actually have similar reasons in their backgrounds? Don't be hard on them all. Some, yeah, but not all 
[2] if I *really* want to have fun, I'll introduce the vegetarianism & bisexuality too <messes with people's minds and laughs evilly> 

[Sorraia]

Well.... what worked for me was to simply NOT look! I wasn't looking for a guy to date, I had actually just come out of a rocky relationship, and was ready for a break. We didn't start dating right away, but did later. The more we got to know each other, the more enjoyed each other, and the rest is history!

But honestly, the way I see it, there are certain morals and values a person holds that they must NOT give up for the world. If your animals are that important to you, then the person you date (and possibly marry) must accept that. That's part of who you are, and if they can't accept it, then they don't truly want to accept you. My ex-boyfriend was pretty much how you described. He didn't necessarily dislike the animals I had, but he did expect me to dump them all should we actually get married. Well, needless to say that did not go over very well (among other reasons I dumped him). My now-husband was ok with the animals from the start, just not used to so many in one household. But they grew on him and he got used to the idea. Now he loves them almost as much as I do, and not only plays with them, but helps me take care of them too (most of what he does is feeding, I STILL feel bad about asking him to help with dirty work like cage cleaning!). It's worth the wait!

[JohannSebastianRat]

As a guy, I don't have much to add to this. I love animals, although I'm allergic to a lot of them. I would consider a relationship with a woman who had a lot of animals as long as she could make some quality time for me too.

I met a woman at a classical-music club, not a dating situation, but we were talking, and I mentioned my rats, and she said "Eww..." and didn't want to listen to an explanation of the difference between pet rats and wild rats. A week later, I was going to her place to help her with a computer problem, and she called me just before I left and said, "Oh if you've been touching your rats could you wash your hands, please?"  Not a likely match...

Mike

[RompStompnBoogie]

You're right...not looking was the way to go about it! Something pretty amazing happened to me, and I'm absolutely stoked about it! Before I dated my most recent ex I had a pretty large, tight-knit group of friends that hung out on an almost daily basis. We went to punk shows together every weekend, hung out downtown every week... We were just close friends that had eachothers' backs, always had a blast, and supported eachother through good times and bad. When I started dating my ex things were cool because a lot of those friends were mutual. As our relationship progressed he grew increasingly jealous and possessive. Unfortunately, I sacrificed much of myself and needless to say, I lost touch with most of my crew. One of the girls from my old group of buddies, my good friend Kelly, has been in my life throughout the tumultuous 5 year relationship. She's always been a true blue pal. After some recent hard times I told Kel that I missed the way things used to be and wanted to get back to my roots. We just started hanging out again very frequently and she has reintroduced me to some old friends! So for the past few weeks I've been having a blast with awesome people just like I used to! The crew isn't completely the same, some old kids have gone, and some new kids have come, but it's equally as great! That said, I met someone really sweet and absolutely adorable, and soooo much fun to be around! He is respectful, has an amazing personality and loves animals! We've been hanging out a lot, not doing anything in particular... just talking, laughing like crazy and having great times with great friends! I can totally be myself around him and he digs who I am. He doesn't expect anything from me or want me to act a certain way, do anything I'm uncomfortable with or be anyone other than myself. He's all about enjoying life and taking in everything around him. He seems to be the complete polar opposite of jealous, possessive and controlling. Basically, he's happy if I'm happy! It's so exciting and definitely refreshing!   

[Dearpie]

As a guy, I don't have much to add to this. I love animals, although I'm allergic to a lot of them. I would consider a relationship with a woman who had a lot of animals as long as she could make some quality time for me too.

I met a woman at a classical-music club, not a dating situation, but we were talking, and I mentioned my rats, and she said "Eww..." and didn't want to listen to an explanation of the difference between pet rats and wild rats. A week later, I was going to her place to help her with a computer problem, and she called me just before I left and said, "Oh if you've been touching your rats could you wash your hands, please?"  Not a likely match...

Mike

You were going to HELP HER with her computer and she had the audacity to say that? I would have never shown up at her door.  That's above and beyond rude.

Rompstomp, that's GREAT!! I just posted in your other thread before reading this one.   Have a BLAST!!!

[RompStompnBoogie]

Thanks, Pie! I am definitely having a blast and I'll cnntinue to do so!!! I'll never lose myself like that again!

[jesirose]

I just waited until after we were married to start getting the pets

I had wanted a hamster and the guy at the store actually suggested a rat. I didn't want one at first but my husband thought it was a good idea. I wonder if he regrets that 6 more rats and 3 cages later Actually he really likes the newest rats and has bonded with them a lot.