It's not too often that I don't know what to do with my pets.
But Laser has me stumped.
Laser is a 7-8 year old female ferret, suffering from insulinoma (diagnosed in august of 06) and adrenal disease (diagnosed a few months later, approx nov. of 06).
She has been on pred for the insulinoma, at maximum dose of 5mg/day.
She has been on melatonin daily for the adrenal disease.
Even though I have a "ferret" vet, I don't trust their instincts and/or their knowledge (what little they have) as much as I trust my own. They don't even know what melatonin implants or lupron depots are.

They didn't know what Laser had, or how to treat it, until I told them.

So here's my dilemma....
Laser is up there in age. She is not a good candidate for surgery.
She is eating relatively well, considering. But not as much as I'd like, and though her belly is large, it is uneven, and the rest of her is boney, leading me to believe it is more tumor mass in her abdomen than body fat.
She is bouncy out of her cage, to the point that I feel guilty for having these thoughts sometimes. But....
She sleeps. A lot. Not the typical "ferrets are nocturnal" sleep-all-day type of thing, I mean, she spends a large portion of her time sleeping. When she is awake, she is in a constant state of itch. I can tell it drives her crazy. The melatonin isn't helping anymore. Bathing in oatmeal soap is ineffective, and even if it DID help, it can't be done very often, or it will just upset her natural oil balance and make matters worse. I've tried supplimenting with flax seed and oils.
I think I have it in my head that it is time. Every time I say "y'know what, I'm not going to put her through this anymore, I'm keeping her around for ME, not for HER"....the next day, she is bouncing around the living room, and I feel like a total jerk for even thinking about it.
I don't know what to do. Everyone says "When it's time, you'll know". I don't believe that. Not right now. Sometimes it's so obvious. But sometimes it's not. I watched my parents agonize over their great dane for months wondering if it was the right thing to do (when I, as an uninvolved party, could clearly see it was waaaay past time) and then after it was done, deal with the guilt of thinking they did the wrong thing (while I, again, uninvolved, knew there was nothing to feel guilty about).
With Laser, Part of me says as long as she is bouncy, leave her be. The other part says How would I like to sleep 90% of my life away, while the other 10% I spent it totally miserable in a constant state of itch, and possibly pain? What kind of "quality of life" is that?
I dunno.
