OMG! How could my dad do this?

[Maggie's Mom]

I went to see my kids today...just got back from CA at 5.  And I went in and They all wanted to be held, so I picked up Maggie and she's SKIN AND BONES!  And then I was really worried and checked for tumors and stuff, but otherwuise no problems!  And then I took a look at my other kids, and Shadow and Mozy are the only ones with any meat on them (well, Riz, Mag, and Harl have a teeny bit).  Mozy has the most.  So I asked my dad how much he was feeding them while going into a short fit of how my kids were starving, and he said ONCE EVERY 3 DAYS!  I was so pissed, I mean, wow!  I did NOT know I could be so angry!  So he told me maybe I  should just feed em, but he won't LET me live with them all the time, so what am I supposed to do?  Go past my curfew every day when I'm at my mom's and feed them, when he could do it perfectly easily?  And come home every night when I'm pon vacation in a different state/country?  Am I supposed to do that?  Goodness knows how many times I've tried to move in for 100% of the time!  And I already come over past my curfew a couple times a week to clean their cages!  What am I supposed to do?  Aaaack!  I know they're my responsibility, but why can't he just feed them when he doesn't let me be around them?  When the rittens come, I WILL stay throughout their lives to make SURE they're fed, as well as I feel the immense need to be there every second of their new lives! He CANNOT keep me from being with them then, and I sure hope he understands that!  Luckily, he's great with baby rodents, but after this there is NO WAY!  

I'm sorry!  I can't beleive I'm ranting this much, but my poor kids were starving to death!  I fed them immediatly when I found out and gave them plenty of kibble to help them plumpen up again!  Bah!

What else should I do for them?  To help them thruy this?  Not tomention I'm leaving for Europe in 6 days and was hoping to have someone come by every couple days, but now that is totally screwed up cause my poor kids need more food now!  Uggh!  Must ask the neighbors...*sigh*.

Sorry I'm so pissed, again.  My dad's never been so bad with them before.  He's usually a great rodent person!  But he thinks a rat being thin is a "healthy" rat!  I mean, these girls were perfect...not fat, not thin, just squishy in the right places, and Maggie was wonderfully firm...the day before I left!  Ugh!  I can't beleive my dad did this...ne never does...but really...what should I do to help get their fat content back up before I leave?

Thanx for listening, and possibly answering questions

[ckhs]

Try some nutrical,better be sure to have someone check on your babies everyday while your gone.

[Maggie's Mom]

What's Nutrical?

[kim]

this is just a stupid thing for me, but if you have rats right now, and they arent getting the best care, is it really fair to bring MORE rats into the world -- the care you say you are determined to give your NEW ratlets should be going to the ones you are already RESPONSIBLE for, IMO.

[Rose]

If this person wasn't your father, what would you do?

The bottom line is he has said that he is not going to feed your rats while you are gone.  That's a pretty clear message.  You are going to have to pay a pet sitter to do it.

If there are any people on this board in your area, maybe you can swap sitting.

[Maggie's Mom]

Oh, no, I was already gone before they got back like this.  I was gonna ask the neighbors for when I'm in Europe...they're across the street and like rats and do petsit rodents

If Dad wasn't my dad, I'd fire him  But as of now, I can't fire my dad cause he's my dad, and he won't let me move in 100% of the time because I "need a mother".  Yes, i need a mother who throws laundry bakets at me and slaps me when I share my opinion.  That's exactly waht I need.  Thanz dad  

My rats usually get lots of attention from my father and are extremely healthy and just really get tons of attention...I just don't know why my dad gave up while I was in Cali...I figure it must be because he moved ithe cage to where the food isn't.  I suppose when the rats aren't with the other kids, he forgets

[Bonnie]

Couldn't you just move the cage back where the "other kids" are while you're away so he'll remember? If it's only beacuse of that and he otherwise took care of them, I think that might work out. Or getting you neighbors to pet sit...

[afmommie]

Would it help your Dad to maybe write out a schedule out for him. Like a weekly day by day schedule? Just a thought. I got pretty sick with the flu and wrote one out for my hubby ( I didn't want to get my crew sick) so he did really great with playing with them and taking care of them for me.

[BlueMoonGoddess]

You could use bin feeders in the cages... they usually store enough dry food for a few days, depending on how many rats you have in the cage. I use them (along with extra water bottles) when I go on vacation, so the person who comes over to take care of them won't have to come every day. If you use a plastic one it might get chewed, but metal ones won't.

[BabyBlue]

Whow! I don't understand how this could've happened! If I ever had to leave any of animals with my dad, I'd be 100% confident that they'd be taken care of. And he doesn't even like rats!!!

Well I wish you'd talk to your dad about this. I don't really know what you can say tho, or what he can say or do to make up for what he already did.

[Bonnie]

OHH bin feeders- i forgot about that!  that's a really good idea! you can either cut a hole in the wire and insert the feeders from outside the cage or they usually come with hooks so that you can set them inside and hook them to the sides. that way if he remembers to add food every three days, and you tell him to fill it to the top when he does, it won't be as bad. The extra water bottles wouldn't hurt either...

[Maggie's Mom]

Oh ya, I forgot about the water bottle!  Gonna blame this one on the rats cause they do it sometimes tho, lol!  They have a HUMUNGOUS water bottle!  But this time I came home and they'd torn it off their cage wall and it was on the ground...ugh.  But I'm sure dad was watering them and would've hung it back up...he isn't THAT evil!

Hehe, I'll defienently look into bin feeders.  Now, what do they look like?  Can you find them in the bird section or something?  I think my dad would really appreciate that!  Course, I'm gonna go as far as make him play with them every day, too!  Poor guy, hehe!  And when he doesn't have the time, have him let them out and free roam (tho IU really do have to clean up my room, tho.  

And, I'm gonna make them a new cage!  One that'll keep the litter in, and keep them temperature fine, make the cage easier to clean, and so on.  Lucky girls

And Kim, I will NOT bring any new ratties into this world in these circumstances.  If dad doesn't shape up, the ratteries over with.  I just don't even trust my current ladies in this current conditions.  Hopefully it'll all clear up by November.

[Squirrel]

You should ask your dad how HE would like to eat only once every 3 days!
Usually I leave a big dog sized dish of dry food in with my rats, just in case; enough to last a week.

[Bonnie]

The bin feeders are kinda sorta L-shaped... they are usually around 4 inches tall and then the bottom part comes out to hold the food where they can get it. Ever seen automatic dog feeders? Same concept.

Anyways, I'm not sure if you'd see them in the bird section. They have the same things for birds, but they usually hold itty bitty bird seed, not chunky rat food.  

You can find them in the small animal section, usually in the rabbit section, because that's what they're usually used for. (I use one for my ferret since they eat every 4 hours or so and I'd hate for him to go hungry). There are plastic and metal ones available.

And strap that water bottle tight!

[Maggie's Mom]

Thanx!  That should help  I just put in the air conditioning-thingy so the heat doesn't get to horrible.  The air isn't even getting thru the towel, but it is cooling the place down a bit  

I'll make sure to get them a bin feeder

[Rose]

Just a thought.   How about a systematic training program for your Dad?  If you really have no petsitting alternatives, you might try it

He may not be as trainable as your ratties, being older and all.  But it's amazing how much better positive reinforcement works than negative feedback.  

Sneak in LOTS of praise and thanks for the GOOD things he's done.  How grateful you are that you can rest easy while you're away knowing that he is taking care of the little ones.  How lucky you are to have such a caring and responsible parent, etc.  

Lay it on THICK.   Turn all those negatives into positives (It's great being able to spend quality time with him, even though you can't live there full time, blah, blah, blah.).  

Send him a loving postcard every day of your trip, thanking him for all he's doing for you and the ratties and how much you miss him.  Send postcards to the ratties telling them how lucky THEY are to have such a nice grandpa.  At least he'll think of them once a day, and that will lead to him checking the food and water.  

Make out a written schedule/protocol of feeding/watering/cleaning/medical procedures.  Go over it with him, using that as an opportunity to impress on him that you know that it is a BIG favor and a LOT of responsibility and how much you REALLY appreciate it.  Crimes of neglect are less easy on the conscience when the expected behaviour is out there clearly stated in writing (with the implied acceptance of responsibility.)

Make the cage/food set-up accessible and easy to use.  Give him numbers of back-up caregivers in case he needs a break.  Put lots of kissy-kissy thanks at the end of the instruction sheet so he will read it every day.  

Positive reinforcement is such a great tool.  With animals, in people management, with LIFE!  And it comes back at YOU, too.  Say it enough times, and people believe and buy into it.

You can teach and old Dad new tricks!

Just one more thing less practical thing.  Your Dad may have been feeling not so great himself.  Sometimes when people are depressed or distracted, taking care of others, however small, can be overwhelming.  It may help you to try to see where HE is coming from in that situation.  From your description of some of your parents' behaviours, you may be one of those kids that's just going to have to accept being more grown-up (in SOME areas anyway)  than the parents.

[Maggie's Mom]

Sounds like training my puppy!  She's trained in both hand signals, and voice commands, I'm so proud  What I can do without REAL dog training, lol!  

Lots of praise, but without the kissy talk used with the puppy, and without singing to him how great he is (my poor kids get that every day, lol!)

I doubt that I can lay it on thick, but I can give him the "schedule".  I can do that very soon, but I gotta clean my room so my other kids don't end up with the rats!  

Well, g2g! Thanx!

[Rose]

Have a good time in Europe.  

If you are in Holland, be sure to check out the sewer rat exhibit at the Emmen zoo.
http://www.rmca.org/Articles/sewerrats.htm

http://home.earthlink.net/~omniron/wrrattours.html