Why do such awful things happen to such good rats? *RIP TEK Sophie*

[Ratwings]

I know I've sort of been avoiding the rat forums lately, but the loss of my sweet, joyful little girl TEK Sophie has been an extremely hard blow.

She died last month of some sort of tumor or polyp that was growing in her ear canal and eventually invaded her pharynx/larynx area. It started many months ago with a slight ataxia and a visible (using an otoscope with a very teeny attachment) lump in her left ear canal that the vet thought looked like a polyp. Between myself and two other vets we tried every medical treatment we could think of but we decided that surgery would not be the best idea. I work at an exotics veterinary hospital, and Sophie was coming to work with me almost every week for a while (and Willow for moral support). The ataxia stabilized at one point for a few months and she was doing very well, though she always looked quite drunken, which just added to her charm, but then she started losing weight and went downhill very suddenly when it became apparent she couldn't swallow anymore, and she was contantly making licking motions with her mouth and salivating excessively, and she also was bleeding out of her ear in the last few days.

It was very difficult thing to go through and I was trying very hard not to think it about it too much, not to get myself to depressed, not to wallow and linger and feel guilty. But I wanted to tell someone, so she could be remembered and so I could just move on.  She was an amazing girl and truly a fighter-- I will miss her so much. Her motto could have been "Keep on truckin" as nothing seemed to get the way of her having fun and just being happy. She may have been the smallest full-grown rat I've ever met or owned, but her personality was almost too big for her body. Which is why I knew she was on her way out in those last few days, because she lost that impish glint in her eye, and she looked so exhausted. She was 16 months old. Now I know she's running swift and straight, jumping and climbing like she used to do before she became trapped in her own body.

Her sister Willow is doing wonderfully, though a bit lonely, and she loves to snuggle with me in the evenings although I feel rotten because I can't give her the kind of companionship she needs.  I will probably be getting her spayed soon so she can live with my 2 boys, as I can't get any more rats to keep her company. Also I wanted to say a big thank you to Dan (TEK) for giving me the chance to have such special rats in my life!  In a year or two when I'm in need of more rats (not really something I'd like to think about), I'll certainly be sending you an email!

And to those of you who are reading this, thank you thank you thank you for helping me remember my Sophie.

[Rattiemama]

What a beautiful tribute for a beautiful little girl. There are some rats that just touch us more than we could imagine possible. It sounds like Sophie was one of them. It is so lucky that she had you to nurse her, love her, and finally help her rest. You will be remembered Sophie. Play hard.

[sbdirham]

A lovely tribute.  Try not to remember Sophie as she was at the end, but as she was at her best.  That is how she will always be at the bridge.  Strong, playful, active and happy.  She will have new friends and lots of treats to keep her occupied while she waits for you.  But do not be surprised if her spirit visits you.  They always come back to where they were happiest.  If you feel a slight weight on your shoulder or a tickle in your ear it is her, stopping by to whisper her love.
You will not be forgotten, sweet beautiful Sophie.  Fly fast and play hard.

   S.

[TEK]

I am So So sorry to hear about Sophie and I know you did everything you could to help her and keep her comfortable.  This is just one of those strange things that comes up that none of us can be prepared for (however I have made a note of it in her lines, just to make sure I don't see anything like this repeating itself again).  Please give Willow extra scritches for me (and a few more treats) and when you are finally up to it, I'd like to show you a photo of their nieces and nephews.  They're a wonderful tribute to their aunt's spark for life!

Keep in touch!  I refer adopters in your clinic's direction often, so I hope some of them listen!

[Ratwings]

Thank you all so much for your kind words. This was good, that I finally got to write this.  It's funny how important this forum has become, how I know when I'm ready to move on when I am able to share and vent here and come you to all for a shoulder to lean on. Speaking of shoulders, Willow sat on my shoulder and bruxed in my ear the whole time I was writing the tribute to Sophie. I don't know what I'd do with out her! Dan, we'd love to see a pic of their nieces and nephews. Feel free to post in here, Sophie would have liked that! She was always so cheerful.

And yes, I believe we've seen an increase in rats in the past 6 months or so! A few months ago a little baby rexy boy came in and I just ran over and squealed and said, "Ooooh this is a TEK baby!"

[Dearpie]

I'm so sorry for your loss, especially of one so young. It truly sounds like she had the best mom giving her the best care possible.  Sleep tight, Sophie.  You'll forever be in your mom's .

[ginniejollie]

What a lovely memorial for such a special little girl named Sophie    Sometimes, try as we might, our precious little ones have to leave for the bridge,    Take heart that Sophie is now free and well, I have no doubt she will be back to visit you soon.  I hope your heart heals quickly. 

[whtnyte]

I'm so sorry your special friend found it time to move on. You were her hero to the end making the choice for her that she could not make for herself.

When my Mr. Speedy passed I started an "In Loving Memory" thread in our Flickr rattie group:
http://www.flickr.com/groups/ratthief/discuss/72157594473916175/
Here is a small sample that might help:
Making That Final Decision to Say Goodbye

You're giving me a special gift,
So sorrowfully endowed,
And through these last few cherished days,
Your courage makes me proud.

But really, love is knowing,
When your best friend is in pain,
And understanding earthly acts
Will only be in vain.

So looking deep into your eyes,
Beyond, into your soul,
I see in you the magic,
That will once more make me whole.

The strength that you possess,
Is why I look to you today,
To do this thing that must be done,
For it's the only way.

That strength is why I've cared for you,
And chose you as my friend,
And why I've loved you all these years ...
My partner till the end.

Please, understand just what this gift
You're giving means to me,
It gives me back the strength I've lost,
And all my dignity.

You take a stand on my behalf,
For that is what friends do.
And know that what you do is right,
For I believe it too.

So one last time, I breathe your scent,
And through your hand I feel,
The courage that's within you,
To now grant me this appeal.

Cut the leash that holds me here,
Dear friend, and let me run.
Once more strong and steady now,
My pain and struggle done.

And don't despair my passing,
For I won't be far away,
Forever here, within your heart,
And memory I'll stay.

I'll be there watching over you,
Your ever faithful friend,
And in your memories I'll play,
... free and happy once again.


- Author Unknown

[Marybelle]

I'm so sorry for your loss.  *hugs*  You did everything you could for her, and she fought hard, but there are just some things you can't beat.  She's watching over you now from the bridge.

[dwankrista]

I'm so sorry.   

[lilspaz68]

I was wondering why you were so quiet on the forums, and now we know.    I am so sorry your wee Sophie finally gave up the fight to be with you.  Those dang physical bodies and their issues.     You both fought long and hard together but as soon as she told you "enough" you listened right away.

Run and play little Sophie, not dizzy or in discomfort anymore...

[Regan]

What a touching tribute to a special girl.  I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Ratwings]

Whtnyte, what a beautiful poem, I'm all choked up! And I'm sorry about your Mr. Speedy.